1. Tiny LED bedside lights that give just enough illumination at night.
2. The quiet in the house as people and things power down for a night of sleep.
3. The small sounds that newspaper makes when one is handling it.
4. The tiniest slivers of two more little baby teeth suddenly appear!
5. The giggly feeling of anticipation as well-written humor builds and of satisfaction as it peaks.
--
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
No-Edit Practicing Practicing
A little experiment to hack out a post. NO editing except for spelling errors (if I can find them).
So I've been practicing practicing. Quite interesting.
Some of the things I've been practicing were not on my original list. That's okay. The important thing is that I am persevering at things I am not so great at.
Among other things, I've been practicing being more generous, getting back into my paper decluttering and learning to play a new instrument. A little bit of everything: psychological, physical/environmental and tautological. (Is that what i mean? Probably not! There's another word more accurate... pedagogical? Yes.)
Okay, so being "naturally" generous is hard for me. My cousin might call that a "scarcity" mentality. I am nervous about having enough for myself. Some of that is habit, part of that is not *taking care of* myself. Part of that is worrying that I will have enough money/energy/mental head space to feel good. So it's a defensive maneuver with some just cause. However, I am experimenting with doing things differently. I admire generous people. My husband, for instance, is a naturally generous person. He'll give time, money, attention to lots of people who need it and to some who don't. He's just wired to want to pitch in and contribute. So cool, eh? So myself is wanting to be more active in my own social relationships... and part of that, I feel, is giving of myself. Not so much as to give myself away but certainly MORE than I do now.
(pause to think of some examples)
Here's a list of things that might qualify:
I showed up at an art opening of a friend and former co-worker. I made that effort to show up despite other things on the schedule. Sometimes I just can't make the openings, but this time I could and I did. I can be supportive and appreciative and enthusiastic. And I enjoyed myself too!
I went to a memorial service. Okay, this was more for me, but I really wanted to be there and bear witness to the stories and the memory of this friend, even though I didn't know him well nor had reached a deeper friendship phase.
(I am having to brainstorm this list, so it's not perfect, okay?)
Ah yes. I bought some lovely earrings for my mother's birthday and contributed a huge platter of veggies and hummus. So often I cannot decide on the best gift for a person or event and I find myself paralyzed. This time I just went out and made it happen. The food was to help out my youngest sister who was coordinating. I already had this especially delicious hummus in mind, so when she responded enthusiastically to my idea, I went out and found an especially delectable selection of raw veggies.... sugar snap peas, for instance. It was goood!
I helped care stuff down stairs. And afterwards, while various clumps of people scattered to talk or play games or had to leave, I made trip after trip between the downstairs room and the kitchen to help clean up; I did not want my sister OR certainly not my mother! to have to do the larger share of the clean up.
(Okay, so this might sound trivial; I am celebrating what I CAN do.)
I've been trying to contact my friends more frequently for getting together for lunch. Rather than wait for them to call me, I'm trying ot be more proactive. It's been really nice in the last several months.
I took care of my friend's cats while she was on a 10-day trip to Europe. We do this regularly, trading cat care, etc, but here I practiced giving a generous amount of time and then MENTALLY not grousing about any of it. Not that I usually complain about helping out my friend at all! I am practicing not complaining.
Oh wait.... did you notice that? I AM PRACTICING NOT COMPLAINING! This is huge, ya'll. Not that I am good at abstaining, no. I am an accomplished complainer. But to give my attitude and karma a boost, I am *consciously* working on not grumbling so much in my everyday life. My reasoning is that I can do something happily or I can do something grudgingly, and it's usually more pleasant for EVERYONE if I don't verbally blow off steam about whatever trivial inconvenience I must endure. I tell you, I am mostly quite proud of myself and the progress I am making. I'll say that the people most positively affected by this change is my husband and myself. ATTITUDINAL ADJUSTMENT - woot!
Back to my list...
Okay, so I am working o the huge amount of paper clutter in the office. I am "sorting with extreme prejudice*. I am taking out all sorts of gar-bage. I am getting back on the FlyLady bandwagon. SO nice.
Aaaaand, yes! I am learning to play a new instrument! I had another instrument in mind as well, but my local string shop did not have one free to rent while I determine whether I am into it enough to buy one. But they did have lots of great ukuleles! And they are a modest investment, so I bought one. Not the most cheap model, but a step up, a nice little instrument. And I have myself a book, and I found a uke tuner online, so I am set.
I've had this a few weeks now, and I am really liking it. I've learned a basic set of C chords and nearly every day, I get it out and play a little. Play and sing, rather, since I am singing to the baby a lot. Being about to play chords to my singing is a lot of fun.
Once I even figured out how to apply a chord to a singing note that was not the note but a complimentary one. I was tickled with my discovery.
My strategy here is slow but steady. I am finding all kinds of songs in this self-instructional book to practice different strumming rhythms and chords. I am practicing holding my fingers and thumbs correctly. I'm not convinced I have the strum position down well (correctly), but I'm experimenting.
Today I started learning a couple of new chords. Oy. My brain is slightly confused. But I have confidence that my brain and my fingers will figure it out with enough exposure and practice.
And now I must close down for the night and see if everyone else in the house is actually going to bed for the night or are going to get up for one last round.
Thanks for listening. I'm hopeful that my practicing practicing will improve. Go me. :)
--
So I've been practicing practicing. Quite interesting.
Some of the things I've been practicing were not on my original list. That's okay. The important thing is that I am persevering at things I am not so great at.
Among other things, I've been practicing being more generous, getting back into my paper decluttering and learning to play a new instrument. A little bit of everything: psychological, physical/environmental and tautological. (Is that what i mean? Probably not! There's another word more accurate... pedagogical? Yes.)
Okay, so being "naturally" generous is hard for me. My cousin might call that a "scarcity" mentality. I am nervous about having enough for myself. Some of that is habit, part of that is not *taking care of* myself. Part of that is worrying that I will have enough money/energy/mental head space to feel good. So it's a defensive maneuver with some just cause. However, I am experimenting with doing things differently. I admire generous people. My husband, for instance, is a naturally generous person. He'll give time, money, attention to lots of people who need it and to some who don't. He's just wired to want to pitch in and contribute. So cool, eh? So myself is wanting to be more active in my own social relationships... and part of that, I feel, is giving of myself. Not so much as to give myself away but certainly MORE than I do now.
(pause to think of some examples)
Here's a list of things that might qualify:
I showed up at an art opening of a friend and former co-worker. I made that effort to show up despite other things on the schedule. Sometimes I just can't make the openings, but this time I could and I did. I can be supportive and appreciative and enthusiastic. And I enjoyed myself too!
I went to a memorial service. Okay, this was more for me, but I really wanted to be there and bear witness to the stories and the memory of this friend, even though I didn't know him well nor had reached a deeper friendship phase.
(I am having to brainstorm this list, so it's not perfect, okay?)
Ah yes. I bought some lovely earrings for my mother's birthday and contributed a huge platter of veggies and hummus. So often I cannot decide on the best gift for a person or event and I find myself paralyzed. This time I just went out and made it happen. The food was to help out my youngest sister who was coordinating. I already had this especially delicious hummus in mind, so when she responded enthusiastically to my idea, I went out and found an especially delectable selection of raw veggies.... sugar snap peas, for instance. It was goood!
I helped care stuff down stairs. And afterwards, while various clumps of people scattered to talk or play games or had to leave, I made trip after trip between the downstairs room and the kitchen to help clean up; I did not want my sister OR certainly not my mother! to have to do the larger share of the clean up.
(Okay, so this might sound trivial; I am celebrating what I CAN do.)
I've been trying to contact my friends more frequently for getting together for lunch. Rather than wait for them to call me, I'm trying ot be more proactive. It's been really nice in the last several months.
I took care of my friend's cats while she was on a 10-day trip to Europe. We do this regularly, trading cat care, etc, but here I practiced giving a generous amount of time and then MENTALLY not grousing about any of it. Not that I usually complain about helping out my friend at all! I am practicing not complaining.
Oh wait.... did you notice that? I AM PRACTICING NOT COMPLAINING! This is huge, ya'll. Not that I am good at abstaining, no. I am an accomplished complainer. But to give my attitude and karma a boost, I am *consciously* working on not grumbling so much in my everyday life. My reasoning is that I can do something happily or I can do something grudgingly, and it's usually more pleasant for EVERYONE if I don't verbally blow off steam about whatever trivial inconvenience I must endure. I tell you, I am mostly quite proud of myself and the progress I am making. I'll say that the people most positively affected by this change is my husband and myself. ATTITUDINAL ADJUSTMENT - woot!
Back to my list...
Okay, so I am working o the huge amount of paper clutter in the office. I am "sorting with extreme prejudice*. I am taking out all sorts of gar-bage. I am getting back on the FlyLady bandwagon. SO nice.
Aaaaand, yes! I am learning to play a new instrument! I had another instrument in mind as well, but my local string shop did not have one free to rent while I determine whether I am into it enough to buy one. But they did have lots of great ukuleles! And they are a modest investment, so I bought one. Not the most cheap model, but a step up, a nice little instrument. And I have myself a book, and I found a uke tuner online, so I am set.
I've had this a few weeks now, and I am really liking it. I've learned a basic set of C chords and nearly every day, I get it out and play a little. Play and sing, rather, since I am singing to the baby a lot. Being about to play chords to my singing is a lot of fun.
Once I even figured out how to apply a chord to a singing note that was not the note but a complimentary one. I was tickled with my discovery.
My strategy here is slow but steady. I am finding all kinds of songs in this self-instructional book to practice different strumming rhythms and chords. I am practicing holding my fingers and thumbs correctly. I'm not convinced I have the strum position down well (correctly), but I'm experimenting.
Today I started learning a couple of new chords. Oy. My brain is slightly confused. But I have confidence that my brain and my fingers will figure it out with enough exposure and practice.
And now I must close down for the night and see if everyone else in the house is actually going to bed for the night or are going to get up for one last round.
Thanks for listening. I'm hopeful that my practicing practicing will improve. Go me. :)
--
Monday, October 5, 2009
Grace in Small Things 35:365
1. The mournful yet alert sound of trains at night, rumbling and wailing in the near distance.
2. Childhood birthday cake: vanilla cake with tart lemon filling and sweet-soft-meringue frosting scattered with coconut.
3. Large lively family birthday parties.
4. Tiny lentils in a spicy stew.
5. Babies laughing over the simplest things: balloons, cats chasing a laser dot, flashlights, silly sound effects.
--
2. Childhood birthday cake: vanilla cake with tart lemon filling and sweet-soft-meringue frosting scattered with coconut.
3. Large lively family birthday parties.
4. Tiny lentils in a spicy stew.
5. Babies laughing over the simplest things: balloons, cats chasing a laser dot, flashlights, silly sound effects.
--
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Grace in Small Things 34:365
1. Free time to hack back the household weeds.
2. Sunny and pleasant Saturdays.
3. Adorable kitten videos.
4. Letting go of that dress I haven't worn, will not wear and have never worn.
5. Reminders to drink my water and stay hydrated.
--
2. Sunny and pleasant Saturdays.
3. Adorable kitten videos.
4. Letting go of that dress I haven't worn, will not wear and have never worn.
5. Reminders to drink my water and stay hydrated.
--
Monday, September 28, 2009
*8Things: You Need to Practice to Get Good At
"Ah, practice. The natural enemy of the moderately talented."
My favorite quote from Magpie Girl last week!
Here's my take from that post:
The things we are naturally, innately, good at are like rafting down stream; all it takes is a bit of steering, and we are there, flying along, following the channel as if it was made for us. Or actually, that we were made for it! There's nothing like finding the ideal channel for our talents and our lives.
It's so easy to flow with the talent, to float downstream. But it's harder to go a-journeying up an intriguing side branch. That takes a little more work. The water doesn't flow as easily, plus it's often uphill. But like salmon, something compels you to heave yourself forward up the stream, following the trickle of water to your desire.
Magpie Girl challenges us to name 8 Things You Need To Practice to Get Good At.
The first one is that I have a hard time persevering with things that don't come easily. So:
1. Persevere with things that don't come easily.
I tend to think that I'm no good when I run into something that's difficult or awkward for me. Not true, but I have to push through the rough patches first.
Underneath that is ... Avoiding discouragement and self doubt. Another biggie. I am so not great at this. Mr Sweetie has been very helpful over the years, but I still have to do all the work. *sigh*
Whoops! heh. I mean, yeah, I sure do have a lot of practice avoiding sliding into discouragement! It's right up there with having a hard time doing the things that are difficult for me. I'm practicing.
2. Play a musical instrument.
I love music. I've fallen in love with numerous instruments over the years, but have not made much headway with any of them except, slightly, with singing. It is painful to play out loud and hear myself squeaking or otherwise torturing the notes. But I still have hope that I will (someday) persevere. I should probably learn to play something simply to practice persevering!* These days I have my eye on a completely different instrument than ever before (something that will allow me to play with other people and be encouraged by similarly-minded musicians), and have hopes it will shake me out of my earlier frustrations.
3. Go with the flow.
I remember the revelation of a special weekend wherein I was determined to not spend so much energy *anticipating* all the wonderful things (and fretting over whether and when they would come), but to just enjoy them as they came (or didn't). Wow! It was fun! But I still do not sit well without some sort of anxious expectations, so I have much more practice to do on this one.
4. Make friends and maintain social contacts.
I both enjoy talking with people (even people I don't know well), and am shy about becoming better known and/or vulnerable to being hurt or judged. (I know this doesn't make sense but that's part of the dynamic for me.) I hate to reveal myself and then end up feeling like the odd duck. I have to really work at keeping up contacts because my tendency is to hide in the house! Yes, it is so much simpler, but ultimately counter productive. I have to constantly encourage myself to invest in friendships without getting so anxious or discouraged.
5. Go to bed at a reasonable hour and not let my mind take on all the distraction it wants.
Really, I don't have to check email one more time or follow semi-interesting news stories. Go. To. Bed!
6. Follow my own path without looking for clues from other people.
I sometimes have an excessive amount of consideration for other people's plans. Sometimes I get stuck waiting for something that never happens because I'm waiting for someone else to decide or act on something. Sometimes I just need to make my own plans for the afternoon, weekend or life, and not worry about coordinating.
(Interesting how many personal revelations I'm pulling up by simply brainstorming this exercise! Self-improvement city, here.)
7. Letting go of sentimental items. Oy! Letting go of anything I *might* need. Double Oy!
Little personally meaningful tchotchkes are irresistible to me. Things my sisters or friends gave me a long time ago or this or that from my childhood. Do I really need to keep all of these? Just to remember a person or a time? They are silting up my life, yet it's dreadful actually giving them up. Then there are things like random city information and medical paperwork. Who knows when I might need it again? I'm working on it: Something comes in the house; one or two things have to leave. FlyLady has been a huge help.
8. Caring enough to dress stylishly.
Wow, another one of those things I have (had) almost completely given up on. It's hard for me to deal with the complexity of dressing well, so I get impatient and don't bother or end up sticking with really mundane combinations. I got so sick of this, but what could I do?
I did start working up a wardrobe strategy through MissusSmartyPants the year before last. It was so much fun, I thought, hey, I can do this! And then 'ere I'd barely gotten my new system up and running, I found myself expecting and expanding, and then nursing and mostly milk-stained. And now it seems there's hardly any point to wearing nice clothes for a year or two. I'm all about washables & durables right now. But still, I am looking forward to working on this again! I'm looking forward to fitting into my nicer clothes... um, when do babies stop spitting up on you? But on the other hand, I've started restocking my wardrobe in bits and pieces to fit my current self. Most of it is not particularly stylish, but I feel good dressing in clothes that actually fit me.
...
So all of these are a stretch for me. I'm not good at any of them, but I can remind myself to practice them. I don't have to be perfect at them to do them at all; I think that's the point. Am I a poster child for FlyLady or what? :)
Next up: I need to find something to try for the fun of it or for hell of it. Something I can allow myself to be bad at, and allow myself to just play with it and practice the practicing.
Happily enough, I have found a few successes and new endeavors to report! More to come.
--
My favorite quote from Magpie Girl last week!
Here's my take from that post:
The things we are naturally, innately, good at are like rafting down stream; all it takes is a bit of steering, and we are there, flying along, following the channel as if it was made for us. Or actually, that we were made for it! There's nothing like finding the ideal channel for our talents and our lives.
It's so easy to flow with the talent, to float downstream. But it's harder to go a-journeying up an intriguing side branch. That takes a little more work. The water doesn't flow as easily, plus it's often uphill. But like salmon, something compels you to heave yourself forward up the stream, following the trickle of water to your desire.
Magpie Girl challenges us to name 8 Things You Need To Practice to Get Good At.
The first one is that I have a hard time persevering with things that don't come easily. So:
1. Persevere with things that don't come easily.
I tend to think that I'm no good when I run into something that's difficult or awkward for me. Not true, but I have to push through the rough patches first.
Underneath that is ... Avoiding discouragement and self doubt. Another biggie. I am so not great at this. Mr Sweetie has been very helpful over the years, but I still have to do all the work. *sigh*
Whoops! heh. I mean, yeah, I sure do have a lot of practice avoiding sliding into discouragement! It's right up there with having a hard time doing the things that are difficult for me. I'm practicing.
2. Play a musical instrument.
I love music. I've fallen in love with numerous instruments over the years, but have not made much headway with any of them except, slightly, with singing. It is painful to play out loud and hear myself squeaking or otherwise torturing the notes. But I still have hope that I will (someday) persevere. I should probably learn to play something simply to practice persevering!* These days I have my eye on a completely different instrument than ever before (something that will allow me to play with other people and be encouraged by similarly-minded musicians), and have hopes it will shake me out of my earlier frustrations.
3. Go with the flow.
I remember the revelation of a special weekend wherein I was determined to not spend so much energy *anticipating* all the wonderful things (and fretting over whether and when they would come), but to just enjoy them as they came (or didn't). Wow! It was fun! But I still do not sit well without some sort of anxious expectations, so I have much more practice to do on this one.
4. Make friends and maintain social contacts.
I both enjoy talking with people (even people I don't know well), and am shy about becoming better known and/or vulnerable to being hurt or judged. (I know this doesn't make sense but that's part of the dynamic for me.) I hate to reveal myself and then end up feeling like the odd duck. I have to really work at keeping up contacts because my tendency is to hide in the house! Yes, it is so much simpler, but ultimately counter productive. I have to constantly encourage myself to invest in friendships without getting so anxious or discouraged.
5. Go to bed at a reasonable hour and not let my mind take on all the distraction it wants.
Really, I don't have to check email one more time or follow semi-interesting news stories. Go. To. Bed!
6. Follow my own path without looking for clues from other people.
I sometimes have an excessive amount of consideration for other people's plans. Sometimes I get stuck waiting for something that never happens because I'm waiting for someone else to decide or act on something. Sometimes I just need to make my own plans for the afternoon, weekend or life, and not worry about coordinating.
(Interesting how many personal revelations I'm pulling up by simply brainstorming this exercise! Self-improvement city, here.)
7. Letting go of sentimental items. Oy! Letting go of anything I *might* need. Double Oy!
Little personally meaningful tchotchkes are irresistible to me. Things my sisters or friends gave me a long time ago or this or that from my childhood. Do I really need to keep all of these? Just to remember a person or a time? They are silting up my life, yet it's dreadful actually giving them up. Then there are things like random city information and medical paperwork. Who knows when I might need it again? I'm working on it: Something comes in the house; one or two things have to leave. FlyLady has been a huge help.
8. Caring enough to dress stylishly.
Wow, another one of those things I have (had) almost completely given up on. It's hard for me to deal with the complexity of dressing well, so I get impatient and don't bother or end up sticking with really mundane combinations. I got so sick of this, but what could I do?
I did start working up a wardrobe strategy through MissusSmartyPants the year before last. It was so much fun, I thought, hey, I can do this! And then 'ere I'd barely gotten my new system up and running, I found myself expecting and expanding, and then nursing and mostly milk-stained. And now it seems there's hardly any point to wearing nice clothes for a year or two. I'm all about washables & durables right now. But still, I am looking forward to working on this again! I'm looking forward to fitting into my nicer clothes... um, when do babies stop spitting up on you? But on the other hand, I've started restocking my wardrobe in bits and pieces to fit my current self. Most of it is not particularly stylish, but I feel good dressing in clothes that actually fit me.
...
So all of these are a stretch for me. I'm not good at any of them, but I can remind myself to practice them. I don't have to be perfect at them to do them at all; I think that's the point. Am I a poster child for FlyLady or what? :)
Next up: I need to find something to try for the fun of it or for hell of it. Something I can allow myself to be bad at, and allow myself to just play with it and practice the practicing.
Happily enough, I have found a few successes and new endeavors to report! More to come.
--
Grace in Small Things 33:365
1. Beating the storm home. Skies went from dusky to dark to scary in a hurry. I just made it as the lightning started to crack it open.
2. Small, colorful nested prep bowls. I so love prep bowls.
3. Blueberry-cranberry sour cream coffee cake. I got the last piece and shared it with my husband.
4. Strumming 3-chord songs and singing along. oh my darling Clementine, oh brother how my heart grows weary, singing Pollywaddledoodle all the day
5. Happy baby smiling wide and showing off her first teeth. The grin is so wide and the teeth, so serrated. Believe that they are sharp!
--
2. Small, colorful nested prep bowls. I so love prep bowls.
3. Blueberry-cranberry sour cream coffee cake. I got the last piece and shared it with my husband.
4. Strumming 3-chord songs and singing along. oh my darling Clementine, oh brother how my heart grows weary, singing Pollywaddledoodle all the day
5. Happy baby smiling wide and showing off her first teeth. The grin is so wide and the teeth, so serrated. Believe that they are sharp!
--
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Grace in Small Things 32:365
1. Colorful, nested food-prep bowls.
2. Apple pie crumble with a hint of crunchy-crisp burnt sugar on the pastry.
3. Hummus with roasted pine nuts.
4. Rain coming down in a thundering sheet.
5. Seeing people dance with such joy on their faces and in their bodies.
--
2. Apple pie crumble with a hint of crunchy-crisp burnt sugar on the pastry.
3. Hummus with roasted pine nuts.
4. Rain coming down in a thundering sheet.
5. Seeing people dance with such joy on their faces and in their bodies.
--
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